experiment with new ideas

The Way to Welcome Unlimited Possibilities

I have found, through these 18 years of being a psychologist in private practice, that what most people do is wait, wait and wait some more. What are they waiting for? Their lives to really begin, their lives to look like they thought they would, their lives to be filled with great joy and happiness because they have a mate or a great job or… Now, the way to complete frustration, anger, uncomfortable days, disappointing weeks and an empty life is to do exactly what I just described. You may think that your perfect person, job, opportunity, situation, no-worries type of life is the only way you can live joyously. That is definitely not true at all.

If the above sounds familiar though, you are certainly in the majority. However, the majority does not mean that you are living in a way that will ever produce the life you so greatly desire. What happens is that you become so focused on what isn’t in your life, you miss what is there to be grateful for. I don’t mean to sound simplistic because what I am describing is not easy or simple. It is actually quite complex. And, it takes practice. I know that at times all of you have moments where you are grateful for something in your life. That is great.

Most of your days, though, I notice, are filled with “well, another week and I’m no closer to the job I want than I was in January” or “this is getting so old, being alone like this, I really am upset” or some version of these statements. You wake up and the first thoughts are about what you want and don’t have. The universe takes note of this kind of inner dialogue and accommodates you by giving you more of that which you put out. We talked yesterday about – what you send out you get back. You want more of what you don’t have? Of course not and you don’t even think about what you think about!!! You just start out thinking thoughts you had the day before. It is a pattern, an old habit.

What if you woke up tomorrow and said things like “I am so grateful I can work today, that I am healthy enough to go to my job” or “I am thankful I have the friend who called last night just to see how I was, what a great gift she is” or “Look at that blue sky, I am so fortunate to live in this place where I can see the sky and even watch the trees start turning…” or “I think I’ll call my sister and tell her how thankful I am she is available to me so often.”

The possibilities of what you could wake up saying to yourself are of course boundless. I want to urge you to expand the way you talk to yourself, the tone you set when you wake up each day, even before you get up. I most want to invite you to consider staying in the present all the time, every moment of the day, finding things that you may have taken for granted but from this day on you don’t, you see with new eyes.

Staying present in the present provides endless opportunities for you to be filled up with joy, with a sense that all is well because – well – because it is happening in your life at this time. There are no accidents and everything happens at the exact time it is going to. Relaxing into the present provides the most fertile ground for unexpected wonderful, exciting situations to arise. Have you ever gone past an exit or a turn onto a street because you were so into your thinking about some challenge, problem or wish that you didn’t pay attention to what you were doing? That is a tiny example of what happens all the time in life when we skip out of the present and into what we wish could be.

We do miss things and those will not be back in the exact way they were at that moment – whether it was a turn, an exit or the way the moon looked, or a cloud, a certain configuration of people… so many things could be listed here. I love the verse that says “be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.” How about renewing your mind this moment by getting and staying in the present. It is truly the way to welcome unlimited possibilities into your life. Experiment with it for at least a month. Let me know how transforming the month was for you.

experiment with new ideas

Dwell in Possibility part 2

Yesterday I started talking about this wonderful subject.  Today, I want to go into more detail about how a person can dwell there when things look rather bleak in their lives.  Have you ever been able to be joyous when things all around you were rather annoying, going wrong or just blah?  That is a wonderful practice that leads you right into dwelling in possibility.  You see, if you look at appearances, that is, things that are around you at the moment, you are seeing what you (and others) created by thinking certain thoughts, by repeating certain thought patterns over time.  When you begin to become acutely aware of what you are thinking and start to monitor it to the extent that you change any “impossible for me” thoughts or “I am too old” or ” it happens to others but not me” or “I’ve tried everything and nothing is working for me” thoughts or “this all sounds too good to be true, change your thoughts, change your life stuff” thoughts and really, really begin to experiment, at least, with the notion that it is your skepticism that is preventing any miraculous experiences from entering your life, you will be astounded at what starts to happen.  Believe me, well, you don’t have to believe me yet, just be willing to do the experiment – which is, to watch every thought that you have – from the moment you wake up until you lay your head down for the night.  What are you thinking?  I had a man write down every thought he had all day and evening one day a few years ago.  He was very upset when he discovered that 90% were rather negative and, when he decided to do it for a second day, found that he was repeating almost all the thoughts he had had the day before – again.  Now, that could be rather discouraging, don’t you think???  ”The Secret” is not a bunch of witchcraft, it isn’t even “too far out” to be believed.  It is age-old wisdom that has become common knowledge and a common experience of those who choose to believe in it fully, not half-heartedly, but fully.  You do attract what you think about, whether you are doing it consciously or not.  You bring about what you think about.  If you are a person who sees the cynical side of life, you are likely to continue to see that in your day-to-day life.  How come?  Because you believe it.  Words do become “things.”  Think about this fact – if you are a skeptic, you are not going to see the miracles of life that are happening all around you.  You really aren’t.  You will see through the eyes of a person who can only view life, most often, with a negative edge.  You may not even imagine yourself as a negative person, but notice, on Monday and the rest of the work week, what you are thinking about the day.  Do you wake up saying to yourself, “here we go again, same ole stuff, I hate Mondays.”  How could your day be glorious after such a “bah humbug” start?  Just try waking up this Monday with the thought “I am going to look for beautiful things and acknowledge them to myself all day long – whether it is a child I notice as I do my early morning walk or a flower I pass as I drive to work or a tree that is all twisted but amazing in its own way…”  You will see what you choose to see, that is just how it is.  So, choose to see beauty, loveliness, unusual happenings, smiling faces (I’m beginning to sound way too “Dr. Positive” here), but really, choose to see things you have passed by on all the other days you have driven this route to your work.  Consciously set an intention (a blog I wrote about a week or so ago) to do things a different way, to take note of things you’ve never noticed.  See what you find out about you.  You don’t have to answer to anyone, you just may be surprised at how life seems different somehow, at the end of that day.

I wasn’t kidding about being joyous when the day is humdrum either.  You get to choose how you are going to go through a day, despite anything that is occurring at the moment in your life.  See how that works for you too.  So you have some experimenting to do.

Hurray for you if you decide to do these things I am inviting you to do.  That will be a great start to a  new life, one that dwells in possibility rather than one that is stuck in impossibility.  Let me know how it is for you.