being grateful

The Way to Welcome Unlimited Possibilities

I have found, through these 18 years of being a psychologist in private practice, that what most people do is wait, wait and wait some more. What are they waiting for? Their lives to really begin, their lives to look like they thought they would, their lives to be filled with great joy and happiness because they have a mate or a great job or… Now, the way to complete frustration, anger, uncomfortable days, disappointing weeks and an empty life is to do exactly what I just described. You may think that your perfect person, job, opportunity, situation, no-worries type of life is the only way you can live joyously. That is definitely not true at all.

If the above sounds familiar though, you are certainly in the majority. However, the majority does not mean that you are living in a way that will ever produce the life you so greatly desire. What happens is that you become so focused on what isn’t in your life, you miss what is there to be grateful for. I don’t mean to sound simplistic because what I am describing is not easy or simple. It is actually quite complex. And, it takes practice. I know that at times all of you have moments where you are grateful for something in your life. That is great.

Most of your days, though, I notice, are filled with “well, another week and I’m no closer to the job I want than I was in January” or “this is getting so old, being alone like this, I really am upset” or some version of these statements. You wake up and the first thoughts are about what you want and don’t have. The universe takes note of this kind of inner dialogue and accommodates you by giving you more of that which you put out. We talked yesterday about – what you send out you get back. You want more of what you don’t have? Of course not and you don’t even think about what you think about!!! You just start out thinking thoughts you had the day before. It is a pattern, an old habit.

What if you woke up tomorrow and said things like “I am so grateful I can work today, that I am healthy enough to go to my job” or “I am thankful I have the friend who called last night just to see how I was, what a great gift she is” or “Look at that blue sky, I am so fortunate to live in this place where I can see the sky and even watch the trees start turning…” or “I think I’ll call my sister and tell her how thankful I am she is available to me so often.”

The possibilities of what you could wake up saying to yourself are of course boundless. I want to urge you to expand the way you talk to yourself, the tone you set when you wake up each day, even before you get up. I most want to invite you to consider staying in the present all the time, every moment of the day, finding things that you may have taken for granted but from this day on you don’t, you see with new eyes.

Staying present in the present provides endless opportunities for you to be filled up with joy, with a sense that all is well because – well – because it is happening in your life at this time. There are no accidents and everything happens at the exact time it is going to. Relaxing into the present provides the most fertile ground for unexpected wonderful, exciting situations to arise. Have you ever gone past an exit or a turn onto a street because you were so into your thinking about some challenge, problem or wish that you didn’t pay attention to what you were doing? That is a tiny example of what happens all the time in life when we skip out of the present and into what we wish could be.

We do miss things and those will not be back in the exact way they were at that moment – whether it was a turn, an exit or the way the moon looked, or a cloud, a certain configuration of people… so many things could be listed here. I love the verse that says “be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.” How about renewing your mind this moment by getting and staying in the present. It is truly the way to welcome unlimited possibilities into your life. Experiment with it for at least a month. Let me know how transforming the month was for you.